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Area Mall Fights Loitering by Blasting Mennonite Hymns

Summary by [SATIRE] The Unger Review
GRETNA, MB Southern Manitoba’s most popular shopping centre in Gretna, Manitoba has gone to extreme lengths to get rid of the teens who’ve been loitering in the parking lot this spring. To address this problem, the mall has set up larger speakers and are blasting German hymns. “We’re playing old choir recordings from MCI,” said mall spokesperson Diane Redekop. “That’ll keep the teens away, I’m sure.” According to the mall, the most effective hym…
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[SATIRE] The Unger Review broke the news in on Friday, April 18, 2025.
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